October Nights

jenniferclark2014:

this is exactly how i feel

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fuckkk bye life

bye tumblr

bye facebook

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jenniferclark2014:

this is exactly how i feel

(Source: soakupthesun2014)

• Be very careful with whom you trust.
• If you don’t feel comfortable, leave.
• Nothing good ever happens after 2 am.
• Realize boundaries.
• Study, study, study. You can party later on. You can’t move the day of the test.
• Reputations don’t leave. Don’t fuck it up.
• Learn to accept change.
• Be brave. Be outgoing.

I know it’s time to look forward and not dwell on the past, but I need to write this for me. So you can ignore from this point on.

This year was the best and the worst year of my life.

I fell so deeply in love. First love. I made a huge life decision that I can never take back. I lost a lot of my friends. I put on a really fake, happy facade a lot of the time. I was diagnosed with an eating disorder and anxiety. I had to rebuild—alone. I gained a new family. I was accepted to colleges—I made another huge life decision. Hello, 2,000 mile distance change. I tried to reconnect with friends; balance is a difficult matter. I said the hardest goodbye.

Change, change, change. New city, new school, new people. What an adjustment. Go big or go home, right? I made a lot of stupid mistakes…but I cherish every one of them because of what I learned from each. I felt like I was leading a double life—home and new me. I experienced the party scene. I had my heart broken and broke someone’s heart. I got hurt by lies and indecision. I met my best friends—soul sisters, right? I believe in that now. I learned to let loose, to not be so structured and uptight 24/7. I learned to not procrastinate. I learned who true friends are. I’ve had nights I don’t remember and nights I’d like not to remember. I’ve had the best laughs and conversations of my life. I reconnected with old friends. 

New Year’s Eve was celebrated with two of my best friends—spa, drinks, laughing—no distance can tear that up.

Here’s to 2012. Please be good to me.

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Holy shit.

1. My best friend, Alena. 
2. Emily
3. Alex
4. Dayna
5. Audrey